The Lazy Genius method, coined by Kendra Adachi, says that we should be geniuses about the things that matter, and lazy about the things that don’t. And who’s to say what matters? You are, don’t forget it. Kendra took this concept and applied it to an extremely pragmatic part of our lives: the kitchen.
I asked you, the listeners, to submit your biggest kitchen-related pain points so that we could tackle them during this interview. Kendra didn’t hold much back as she reveals her simple steps to help YOU tackle the 5 biggest challenges you face in the kitchen.
From tricky layouts, to meal planning, and every drool worthy Instagram kitchen in between, Kendra wants you to feel completely empowered to make your space a reflection of you and your values. An added bonus is that with these tools you may start with your kitchen, and end up transforming your life.
About a few other things…
Do you struggle to create habits that stick? It’s not your fault. The truth is simple: you’ve been trying to form habits using methods designed for perfect robots–not real women living real lives. It’s time to change that. If I could help you gain confidence in creating habits AND guide you to uncover the ONE supportive habit to deeply care for yourself, could you commit 21 days to learning this method? The Sticky Habit Method is a 21-day course that revolutionizes the habit-formation process. It’s real habits for real women.
Sign up for the Go Getter Newsletter to get Progress Pointers in your inbox every Tuesday.
You can listen the episode below, or on Apple Podcasts/iTunes, Spotify, Youtube, Overcast, Stitcher, Pocketcasts, or search for “About Progress” wherever you get your podcasts. If you like the show please share it, subscribe, and leave a review!!
SHOW NOTES
Kendra’s Instagram, Website, Book, Podcast
My upcoming FREE Class
My NEW Habit Course
Foundational course, “Finding Me.”
Leave a rating and review for the podcast!
Join the Strive Hive, my monthly membership group
Lend your voice and experience + be featured on the show HERE
Join Monica on Facebook and Instagram
Songs Credit: Pleasant Pictures Music Club
TRANSCRIPT
Monica: Kendra adachi it is so great to have you back on the show.
Kendra: I’m so happy to be here, Monica. Thank you for having me.
Monica: I just want everybody to know what a genuine person you are. You are one of those people that it feels so easy to be around, cuz you’re just, you are exactly who everyone thinks you are.
Kendra: thank you.
Monica: that in you.
Kendra: thank you very much. That’s very sweet.
Monica: When you came on the last time we talked more about the principles behind lazy genius. And I wanted to start with a quick refresher, even though our topic is different because the principles around lazy genius is so relevant to our full discussion today.
So if you can just give us a little refresher on what lazy genius means and like a little bit of a preview on why that matters when it comes to kitchens,
Kendra: Absolutely. Yes, absolutely. So a lazy genius is someone who is a genius about the things that matter and lazy about the things that don’t, but to you, what matters and does it matter to you cuz we all have different definitions and lists of what might matter. And that’s part of the problem in sort of living like on the genius side of things where you’re like, I’m gonna be amazing at everything.
Or then when you’re like, well that did not work. And so you swing to the far side of being lazy where you’re like, everything sucks and I’m not gonna try it all. And it’s just like, Sad. It’s like really defeatist, but the thing is like both sides are exhausting. Like you think that we, I, I think we know like intuitively and intellectually, like, oh yeah.
Trying at everything. Like that’s makes you real tired, but guess what? So does not trying. So does not caring. Because there are things we care about. There are things we wanna put energy in and pretending to not care for whatever reason that we might pretend, whether it’s like embarrassment or shame or fear of rejection, or like all of these, like things we need to go to therapy for.
It’s also really exhausting. So being a lazy genius is about, Hey, let’s name what matters about this thing and decide how we can support it. How can we be a genius about it and how can we let certain things go? And the best way to do that is to use the 13 lazy genius principles that I lay out in extreme detail in my first book, the lazy genius way.
And I wanted to write a book that was a self-help book for people who are tired of reading self-help books. Like I don’t, these aren’t working like maybe this thing, this particular thing worked, but no author is speaking directly to me at my personality and my season of life. And then what about when my season of life changes or my job changes or my, you know, like we’re in COVID or what, like, there are all these things that can impact our lives and our time management and our choices and how we feel about ourselves and our people and all of that. So I wanted to create principles that were versatile and personal, that anybody can apply to any situation, no matter their circumstance or season of life.
Monica: And you nailed it. I will say you absolutely nailed it as someone who reads a lot of self-help books. And even as someone who loves personal development, I feel like most of those books are written for someone else. Some other person
Kendra: some other
Monica: unicorn. Yeah. And if I feel that way and I love personal development, then everyone has gotta be feeling that way.
So, so now let’s segue to how, when I interviewed you the first time you were in the middle of writing this new book and I have it. Yes, you were. You were right in the middle of a, I think you were taking a sabbatical actually. So let’s talk, well, not from an interview with me, I guess, which I am grateful for, but how does, how do those principles work with a kitchen?
And why did you decide to write a book about kitchen systems
Kendra: Yeah. Well, we all have one. Like I was sort of like, we, one of the reasons that I am really proud of the lazy genius way is because, like I just said, it doesn’t matter what your life looks like, like it’s gonna be relevant to everyone, but categorically, something that is relevant to everyone is eating
Monica: Yeah.
Kendra: everyone, eats.
Everyone has to eat. Everyone. So how can we apply these principles to this thing that is such a, a constant companion in our lives, but because of its constancy, because it’s always there, especially if there is some sort of challenge. In your eating, whether it’s dietary restrictions or picky eaters at home or budget, or you work a full-time job, and you’re just too tired.
When you come home to like make dinner, there are so many, or all of those things, it could be all of those things. So we all have challenges that impact our kitchen, whether we are really, really good at cooking and really like to cook, or we have a big kitchen, or we sort of feel comfortable in there for the most part, or we just use it to make coffee.
But I think that one thing that I notice as a through line for a lot of people is that even if you’re comfortable in the kitchen, you might not enjoy it. and if you’re uncomfortable, you definitely are not going to enjoy it. I’ve always loved food. I’ve always loved gathering. I love to teach people about, I mean, I like to teach people how to cook.
That was actually my first business, like almost 15 years ago, but I, more than that, I actually love to teach people, all the other things about the kitchen that are not cooking because you still need those. Even if you know how to cook, you still need those other things. So that is why I decided to write the lazy genius.
Monica: you know, we always talk about the kitchen being the heart of the home, but as I was listening to you, I mean, I, I am one of those people that I do love cooking. I do love organizing. And I mean, that’s like my favorite thing to do, but I, I can be good at it, but at the same time, like that is me. I, it is not enjoyable because it’s a constant Groundhog experience of having to cook and clean and cook and clean.
And that’s even with my husband who helps out with that too. ,
Kendra: I think it makes a lot of sense that we wanna, we want to care for ourselves in this room that is often used to care for other people.
And if we just sort of like relegate it to, okay, well it’s, it’s only utilitarian or, I mean, it’s fine. Like, I just don’t want anyone to settle. For how they feel in the kitchen. I think everyone, again, whether you cook everything from scratch or you only make coffee, like the only thing in your fridge is LaCroix.
Like all, every single person deserves to feel enjoyment and at home in their kitchen, no matter how they use it. And so that’s kind of the goal of this book is to elevate that like, yeah, we’re getting by to, I am getting by, but I also kind of like, I like it sometimes too.
Monica: and I love so much that that’s the goal. It’s just enjoyment. It’s not even about it being the, the best organized kitchen you can master, cuz it all goes back to those lazy genius principles of what actually matters to you and how that can lead to enjoyment. Without going page by page through your wonderful book, which I’m tempted to do.
It was really hard for me to narrow down what to discuss with you, because like you said, it is such an important space in our lives and it takes up so much of our lives too. So what I did instead is I asked my audience for questions. And from those, I was able to narrow it down to four big challenges that they are facing that are getting in the way of. The health of the heart, of their home, you know, that are really impacting them. So we’re gonna go through these and do something different and it’ll be fun. I think we’re gonna go through these four biggest challenges that came up and your advice on how to tackle them. And we know this is not super individualized, but you, since you were so principal based, I’m sure they’ll be able to apply it to their
Kendra: Oh, we’re gonna nail it. It’s gonna be great.
Monica: We’re gonna nail it. Okay. The first two have to do with having a less than ideal actual space within their kitchen and of those. The one that came up the most often actually was having two little counter space and this leads to common problems like clutter and having a difficult time preparing food.
So should those people, what can they do about this challenge of too little counter space?
Kendra: So in the lazy genius kitchen in the first part, the book is divided into three parts. And in the first part, I teach the five steps that you apply. To lazy genius, anything in your kitchen and frankly, anything in your life, really like it works for all the things, but the, and so that’s what we’re gonna do is I just wanna apply these five steps kind of in real time.
And the first one. So if we’re gonna talk about two too little counter space or too many things on the counter, so the first step is to prioritize it is to name what matters. Okay. So presumably if someone’s frustration is that they have too much on their counters. Whether the counter space is sufficient or not.
Right then that’s what matters. Clearing the decks. Right? Clear having the space clear and maybe having it consistently clear is also really important. Like you don’t wanna have to go through, you don’t wanna move stuff in order to make dinner, you would like to just make dinner. Right. So that’s likely the priority is that the counters are generally speaking.
Pretty clear. Now the second step after prioritize is to essentialize and that one is gonna be super, super important right now because essentialize is to get rid of what is in the way of what matters. So if what matters is that the, the counter is clear. Now, one thing very easy is like, you might just have too much stuff on your counter and here’s the problem.
Here’s what we do. We. Are living our lives. We are in, we’re in it. Right. We’re in the thick of it. And so often when we’re in the thick of it, we don’t see our regular life for what it is. Like, we don’t really sort of look at it and assess and examine in a kind way, but like, huh, why am I frustrated? We just stay frustrated, but we keep doing the thing.
Right. And so what I want to invite everyone to do is to get rid of what is in the way. Of a cleared off counter and it’s not just stuff it’s, it’s not just stuff. It could be stuff. It could be that you’re like, well, I always put my purse there or I always put the mail there. Or breakfast dishes are always on the counter when we get to dinner.
Like it, it could be stuff. It could be that like everybody that, you know, puts their spoons and their tongs and whatever in a, in a little canister, you know, next to their stove. But. You don’t wanna do that. You like, you would rather have the counter space and you would rather put that stuff in a drawer next to the stove or whatever.
So it’s like get rid of the physical stuff that is in the way of what matters to you. You could also get rid of habits that are prevent, or that are keeping the counter messy, like putting the mail on the counter. Find another place. That’s another principles to put everything that’s place, put the mail somewhere else.
Like, think about what am I doing that is in the way of this. What are other people in my household doing that is in the way of this and not in a like, blamey way, this is all steeped in so much kindness, right? It’s like, okay, what’s in the way of this. Then the third step is to organize. Then you put things in their place.
If you try and go here’s, here’s the other thing that we do. If you have cluttered counters, the way that you wanna organize it is to build a new kitchen. You’re like, we need to renovate. We need a new kitchen and if you have the money, you do it, but you still end up with the same problems in the end, or you don’t have the money.
And you resent the fact that you can’t redo your kitchen.
Monica: Mm-hmm.
Kendra: So how about instead? How about instead we just go like, okay, what matters about this? I do want it clear what’s in the way. I don’t think I need to keep this like bowl of fruit on the counter. I could put it in the middle of the table. Like it’s okay if it’s in the middle of our kitchen table or somewhere else, like that’s cool.
Let’s do that. Like. and then you go, okay, what do I need to put in its place? Where, what needs to maybe it’s that you’re cutting board. Maybe you get like a big old wooden cutting board and it stays on your counter always. And it’s like, you have a house rule, which is another lazy genius principle. It’s like, no one is allowed to put anything on my cutting board except food that you are currently cutting, you know, it’s like, and what that does is that blocks out that space for dinner prep, always.
Always always. So you put that cutting board in its place. Like there are so many different things depending on your kitchen makeup. And but until you go through those steps in that order, you’re not gonna see it. You’re just gonna go all or nothing and be like big black trash bag energy, where you’re just throwing everything out or you’re getting angry at your people.
Or you’re like, we need $30,000 because we need to redo our kitchen. And it’s like, no, you just need to move the fruit bowl. Like, just move the fruit bowl. It’s gonna be okay. It’s gonna be.
Monica: I think too, one of the hardest parts of that is just we hold onto stuff because we don’t have system systems on how to care for that stuff, you know? And I, and I love how you break that down as well, you know, in the book, how to, how to take care of those kind of issues. It’s all connected. So thank you for going through those first three steps.
Let’s talk about the next less than ideal space. And, and by the way, there are five. So we wanna make sure people
Kendra: Yes, I’ll do the, I’ll do the other. I’ll bring the other two steps in and another
Monica: Great. Awesome. Okay. The next less than ideal space challenge is people who do not have enough storage. Now I totally relate to this. Before we lived in this home, we lived in a 1200 square foot home as a family of six, and our kitchen was very tiny and we had our laundry in the kitchen too.
So I. Want to just say, I get this people. And the biggest issues that come up with that lack of space is not having access to things easily. Not having enough space to put things. A lot of people say they don’t have pantries. Ugh. So just not enough space. Let’s go there.
Kendra: so we’ll go through our five steps again. And four and five I’ll just go ahead and say four is personalized, cuz you wanna feel like yourself. And do things that like meet you where you are. You don’t have to fit into someone else’s mold of how you need to feel in the kitchen and experience your kitchen.
And then five is to systemize where you keep things in a flow. Okay. So I think that fifth step will come into play. Pretty significantly actually when it comes to not having a lot of storage and I’ll come back to that in a second. So if we’re saying, okay, what matters now you could say what matters about the storage in your kitchen?
I think that’s too. I think that’s too big of a question. So whenever we are, whenever we are faced with some sort of challenge in our kitchen, or we feel that overwhelm of like, it’s just not working, the more we can make the problem smaller, the, the easier it is to find a solution, small problems require small solutions, big problems don’t have solutions.
Monica: Wow. Why is that so simple, but so true. Like I never would’ve thought of it that
Kendra: right. Right. And that I think is for a lot of things, it’s like when we talk about even just like huge cultural things, huge cultural issues. Like if we look at it on this huge scale, like we’re all just gonna give up because there’s not a clear answer for big things, but if we make things smaller and we work within like where we are and what we are doing, then there actually is movement.
So small steps, small. Problems, small solutions are really the key to all of this. So rather than looking at your kitchen and being like, I don’t have enough storage or I don’t have enough space, I want you to narrow in, on like a particular area that is frustrating in your kitchen. Right? So maybe it’s something like, I feel like I have to always move like the pots and pans, I don’t have a cabinet big enough for all my pots and pans or something like that.
and all right, so you’re gonna say what matters about that? Well, it might be, I wanna be able to get to my pots and pans without getting angry. You know, I wanna open something or pull down what I need without having to like cl cl itty clank through all the things and sift through what I need to find.
All right. So second step is, we’re gonna centralize. We’re gonna get rid of what’s in the way what’s in the way. What’s in the way of that. It could be a number of things. It could be that 30% of the pots and pans in that cabinet. You don’t use,
Monica: Hmm.
Kendra: it could be that you need a shallow, like you could trade in four different skillets and pots for like a shallow cast, iron something.
That’s pretty that you leave on your stove that doesn’t require counter. right. It, it could be that you get rid of the expectation that pots and pans, like I just said, need to be stored in a cabinet at all. You could leave them on the stove. You could get a pot rack, you could get a shelf like a, like a, an actual, like bookshelf or free standing, something that can tuck into a corner and you just stack your things over there.
Or you can remove things that are prettier from cabinets and move those over to a corner shelf so that you and you, you know, you put. Pots and pans where the cups would normally go, like, think about unusual. When you move on to step three of put everything of organized, put it in its place. It doesn’t, there are no rules about place.
You get to decide like you absolutely get to decide if it keeps you from losing your mind when you’re making dinner to keep, you know, your pots and pans. I’m trying to think of like a weird place to put ’em, but like literally on top of your counter, and it works for you. You should keep your pots and pants on top of your counter.
Like that’s the goal is for you to enjoy your kitchen. Not to have it look like what someone else wants. And that’s part of the personalization. We wanna feel like ourselves. One of the things that keeps us from feeling like ourselves is when we’re mad or frustrated or ashamed or whatever. Exactly. So if we can even remove that, it’s like, I wanna feel like myself.
And one of the ways that I can do that is to be. Cool. And kind to myself about these choices that I’m making. It’s okay. That if someone comes to my kitchen and they’re like, why do you keep your pots and pants there? It’s like, because I actually enjoy cooking when they’re there instead of when they’re here and it’s like, great, like that’s the answer?
And then the fifth step is to systemize is to keep it in a flow. And one of the things that I think is so imperative, like so deeply imperative on like a practical, practical level when it comes to the stuff in your kitchen. Is again the principle of putting everything in its place. And this is literally like, you can organize here’s the problem is we like organize something.
We usually organize it before we essentialize and we organize things we don’t need.
Monica: Oh my gosh.
Kendra: like a lot of the time, but if you can let’s so you’ve, let’s say that you have gotten rid of the things you don’t need, and you have organized a shell for a, you know, whatever, a fridge, something you’ve organized, something, and everything had a place when you organized.
But when you use that thing and you do not return it to its place, you do not put it back in its place. You are gonna be back where you started in no time. So if you create some sort of system, like if you create, if you organize in some way, then a way that you can systemize it and keep it in a flow is to use that principle.
Just put everything back in its place. If you’ve got little kids, let’s say like, I have a one of our ways that we keep our kitchen sort of in a flow as we have a lazy Susan on the counter. What that we call a drink spinner. I actually said it in a podcast episode. One time, I was like . I was like, yeah, we have a drink spinner.
And people were like, where do I find a drink spinner, I Googled drink spinner. Like what, who makes what brand? And I didn’t clarify. I was like, oh, literally guys, it’s just a lazy Susan. It’s just like a little, like any lazy Susan you wanna get. But we have that on our counter because one of the things that was frustrating me about our kitchen and our home were that there were always cups every.
And also that kids couldn’t find their cup. And so they would get a new one. And then we would go through literally every cup that we owned by the end of the day. And I was like, I’m gonna lose my mind. And so instead of losing my mind, a lazy genius did and said, we need a place for cups. We need a place for cups that are in, in use.
Right. And so I got this lazy Susan. I tried. We’ve had it for over a year and it’s magical. It’s like, put it on the drink spinner. It’s just put it in its place and keep putting it in its place or else your system will fall apart. But it’s very simple. Just put it in it.
Monica: That’s what I love that you preach to. I mean, it really can be simple, no need to spend a fortune at the container store. I mean, even the dollar store has great containers too, but it doesn’t have to be so complex. I feel like one of the things we do is. To luxuriate in the problem. Just, it’s hard to open our minds, like cuz we think,
Kendra: very true.
Monica: to look like the home edit and how they do things, which I love.
I love them. I love watching their stuff, but yeah, what, what you’re kind of helping me realize is that’s a big source of the, the challenges we’re facing is just luxuriating instead of being open, just being open.
Kendra: And, and there’s, there’s something too about, especially in, in home organization, kitchen type stuff. Most of the things we encounter. When it comes to the kitchen on TV, you know, on Instagram, all of that, it’s really beautiful. And, you know, cookbooks like photos of food are beautiful. Organizational shows, show beauty Instagram accounts that, that organize things.
They show the beautiful parts of it. Okay. Now the thing that’s tricky about this is that we cannot resent those people for making things beautiful because otherwise we wouldn’t buy it. You would not buy a cookbook that does not have pretty pictures of its food or pictures at all of its food. Generally speaking, you probably wouldn’t follow an Instagram, an organizational Instagram account that doesn’t show pretty shelves and things lined up and things in rainbow order like that, that does something for it’s like.
Very pretty to see you would probably not watch a show, even though I really tried to make the show when I made the lazy genius kitchen video series of like, Hey, we’re not doing sexy before and afters here like that. That is fun to watch, but that’s also typically not real life, but I think what’s important is for us to see a name.
That the industry is not out to get you. It is just built on being beautiful because that’s what we respond to. But you can use that as inspiration, not as like a judgment on your own organization, because especially if you’re like, I don’t really care if things are pretty, like, I want this part to be pretty, but like by pantry, I’m not gonna decant everything.
Like for me personally, under no circumstances, am I ever gonna decant things into jars in my pantry? Because like, I get so frustrated when you can’t. The last cup of goldfish from the box into the container. I’m like, well, this is terrible planning. I’m just gonna leave them in the box. Like, it’s just not worth it, but it’s not worth it to me.
And it’s okay if it’s worth it to someone else. So it’s like, I want it to be a twofold. Permission giving moment here where it’s like, you can care about things being beautiful and you also don’t have to, both of those things can be true. Both of those kitchens can exist and those two people can still enjoy their kitchens equally.
And also remember that the industry is not out to get you really it’s just built on the kitchen is a beautiful place. So you, you can see it for what it is. You can see it as, not as a judgment on your own on your own life, but just as inspiration and entertainment and that’s okay.
Monica: Oh, I’m so glad we went there cuz that’s I mean, that was, that should have been the third, big challenge is just that, that pressure. That pressure there, but like, like we said, there’s inspiration. And as someone, one of my top five values is actually beauty and I’ve like taken all those value tests and I’m like, that’s so superficial, but I just actually
Kendra: it’s not,
Monica: it’s a big part of just, I love to make things beautiful.
I love to notice the beauty. So, but like you said, it can be inspiration. Okay. Let’s talk about meal planning, which I’m sure we could talk about for six hours.
Kendra: I talk about meal planning a lot. I have a lot of words about meal planning.
Monica: Yeah. And you have so many great episodes on it, too. So we’re just gonna tell them to go into the archive. So with meal planning specifically, we wanna speak to the people who are so burnt out. I’m gonna raise my hand. I’ve like been making the same meals for the past two years
Kendra: I’ve been making ’em for the last 12. So welcome to the club.
Monica: Okay. So maybe that’s okay. So let’s, let’s talk to the people who are really struggling with meal planning, cuz they’re so sick of their own cooking.
Kendra: Yeah. Got it. So the first thing I would say this is, we’ll just pull out some principles here, cuz you can move towards changing your feeling by using those five steps. You absolutely can. But I wanna just sort of sit with like, okay, let’s talk about that. That feeling of being tired of your own being in the rut right there.
There is nothing inherently wrong with being in a rut. There is nothing inherently wrong with cooking the same meals over and over and over and over. There’s not now, I’m not saying that you shouldn’t feel frustrated by that if you do, you’re allowed to feel that way, but it could be that you could take even just a little bit of the edge off of that frustration by simply being like this is okay.
And frankly, I’m just gonna, I don’t have not done any sort of poll about this. The number of people who have said to me that they feel frustrated by being in a rut. There is something about us that, that makes us think that no one else is in a rut. We’re the only. That are in a cooking rut. We’re the only ones that cook the same things over and over again.
You guys, everybody cooks the same things over and over again. Like literally everyone, the only people who don’t are like have to do food stuff for a living. Like, I really think that most of us are just like, We’ve got our 12 things, you know, we know how to make tacos. We do these two types of pastas. We like this thing from trader Joe’s and we just, we go to grandma’s and we just rotate.
And that is how most people that you probably talk to eat. But in our heads, we have this like romanticized idea of how that we’re supposed to be making new things all the time, or you see other people’s meals and probably. That meal that you see is one of their 12, but because it’s not one of yours, you think that they’re eating so much variety because their 12 is not your 12.
No, they just have their own. I mean, that’s really kind of how it goes. So I just wanna like, just, I don’t know, just like douse, everybody in freedom here. Like we’re all kind of in this. So maybe that can give you kind of a deep breath. The other thing I will say about feeling like you’re in a rut is that there are seasons of life.
That’s a lazy genius principles to live in your season. There are just seasons of life that make it really difficult to. Variety and cook multiple things. If you have a full-time job, if you have other humans in your home, if you are the primary cook and you don’t have a lot of help, if you don’t have the disposable income to get a lot of takeout or to buy convenience foods like vegetables that are already cut for you, or like, there are lots of things.
That can keep us from experiencing this thing that we want to, but they are a season of life. They are a season of life. So instead of resenting that season, I just wanna invite everyone to look at your season with kind eyes and allow it to show you what matters to you. Now you can be like, oh, this is just so frustrating.
Like I wanna make more stuff. Maybe it’s that I did this the other day. Here’s here’s an example. I was making spaghetti again. The, we eat spaghetti once a week. Legit easy one. Maybe, maybe sometimes every two weeks, because one of my kids doesn’t like spaghetti, like a weirdo. There’s no meal that I make in my entire, in all of the meals we make.
There is not a single thing that everyone loves, not a single thing.
Monica: that’s a relief, dear.
Kendra: So, yeah, so just like, we’re all, we’re all doing. Great. All right. So I was making spaghetti again and I was feeling the rut. I was like, I am so annoyed to make spaghetti again. And it’s not even hard. It’s like, I use a jar sauce. Like we don’t do salad, we don’t do anything.
We just have a bowls spaghetti, like, it’s fine. But I was still just like so resentful because it was just, I was doing it again. And I ended up, I was in. In the moment, texting my friend, Ashley Rodriguez, who is a cookbook author. She like makes she forages for her own food. Everything she makes is beautiful.
She’s like all these things. And and I was complaining to her. I was like, Ashley, I’m making spaghetti again. Like I was so mad and she said, well, is there a way that you can like grab onto the feeling you wish you could have in making a different meal while you’re making that meal?
Monica: Yeah.
Kendra: And I thought, actually I can, I poured myself a glass of wine.
I turned on music. I made sauce. Instead of doing a jar, I had lettuce in the fridge and I made a couple little side salads for me in co and tossed them in like a really, like I made a little vinegarette. I didn’t, I had one extra bowl. Like that’s all, it was, it was one extra dirty bowl, but I just was like, you know what, I’m gonna enjoy.
We had spaghetti still. And it was like, I put my, I, I took the time to put like Parmesan. I cut up a little bit of parsley even so I could have some green on my bulbs spaghetti. None of the kids did cuz they’re not gonna eat anything green. And it was like it transformative. It was a really transformative experience because I thought, you know what?
It’s not always about the food. It’s the energy you bring into the meal. And, and so it was such a good reminder and. All that to say, there are seasons of life. You guys, there just are where we don’t have the margin or the money or the the pallets of our family that lead us to a place where we can cook a lot of like adventurous stuff or try new things or whatever.
And frankly, even if you did have, let’s say you have kids and they’re really picky. I think it’s probably fair to say that even if you did not have picky kids, it would still be a transition for you to have the energy. To like, make all these creative things all the time, you know, like we kind of blame other people and I’m not saying blame yourself.
I’m just saying it’s more complex than that. And if we can just take a deep breath and be kind to everybody about it and start small, and that’s the principle to use here is to start small, like make the sauce. If that makes you feel good. Instead of using the jar that one day I haven’t made sauce since, but I don’t resent my spaghetti as much.
Like I think about that moment. So anyway, so all that to say. Those are like some big swooping ideas. I have so many
Monica: but we
need
Kendra: planning things, but we need the big swooping ideas.
Monica: I think, I think almost, especially with meal planning, we almost need those mindset shifts kind of even more so to start with at least in the practical, but I will just refer them to your archive. I will say. So that harry styles makes everything better. I
Kendra: are not wrong. His Harry’s house is like so good. That album. So good. So I didn’t think I would like anything more than the last one. I could forget the name of it, but like you’re absolutely right. And if you have, everybody’s got a fill in the blank there, blank makes everything better. Pull that into dinner, pull it into what your energy and getting your meal in.
Like it just. Those simple, simple things make such a huge difference. You don’t have to like, like reorganize everything. You don’t have to do like some huge overhaul and everybody we’re gonna eat a new recipe every day for the next 30 days. The next, like, you don’t have to create like a recipe challenge or like just like turn on music and take a deep breath.
Like you’re doing great.
Monica: well, speaking of swooping ideas, the last challenge is go gonna be one of those kind of challenges. This I’m gonna read it word for word, cuz this one just made me crack up. When someone submitted this, I said, quote, my kitchen is fine. I am the limiting factor and they kind of are laughing at themselves.
This is just for the people who just feel naturally, quote, unquote, lazy, maybe even less than lazy. They just feel like maybe uncapable or insecure with everything. Kitchen systems, meal planning, cooking is just all straight up hard for them. So what kind of advice could you give to those people?
Kendra: so my first thing I would say is to get the Lazy Genius kitchen, cuz it will just be your best friend. I’m just telling you like the book will, it really will. It’ll it’ll it’ll change. It’ll change everything. One thing at a time. I think it’s a resource. It’s a forever resource truly. So other than that I would say a couple things.
One is. Do even if you feel like you’re the limiting factor, do you still enjoy it to a point? Like, is it still like working enough because you don’t have to change anything? Like, just because you’re not doing things in the way that a lot of other people do them, if you’re like, you know what, I’m actually fine with that though.
You can just keep doing it. You don’t have to change it thing. So I just wanna say that first. Now the second thing I would say is if we just quickly, let’s quickly walk through the five steps here, let’s say. That your priority. If you’re prioritizing number one, you’re naming what matters you want. Let’s say, particularly for meal planning, we’ll sort of combine three and four a little bit.
In this example, let’s say you’re just like, I’m not a planner. I don’t, I just don’t have the tools. I don’t care. I don’t wanna think ahead. I don’t wanna be himmed in, I, you know, you’ve got all these different things. Okay. So number one, name what matters. It sounds like perhaps maybe what matters is you just want it to be as easy as possible.
You don’t want anything complicated or you won’t do it. And maybe even the, what you do needs to be like, as simple as like, this is what we’re having for dinner. Like you’re, you’re barely planning a thing. Right. But if let’s say naming, what matters is you want it to be easy. You want it to just be really easy.
Okay. Essentialize, what can we get rid of? What is in the way of it being easy? It could be your expectations that it has to be. I think in our heads, we’re like, well, if I am not, if I don’t have it written down on a white board, if it’s not color coded, if it’s not organized, if it’s not on my calendar, if my children don’t know that my rhythm is that I plan on Tuesdays, then I have failed.
No, no, not at all. Like. You could literally be like, oh, we gotta eat soon. What should we eat? Like that could be your meal plan. like is just deciding it’s totally fine. So it could be getting rid of expectations. It could be getting rid of aspirational cookbooks, aspirational tools, aspirational recipes that you don’t have the skill set right now to use or do that’s okay too, you know, get rid of things that are complicating it for you that are making you feel bad and that you’re not gonna, you’re not gonna use.
So then organize, put everything in its place. It could be if you want it to be easy and it doesn’t have to be aspirational for meal planning, you could write down on a single piece of paper and put it on your fridge or whatever, like your list of 10 things, 10 meals. And it’s like, these are 10 meals guys, which should, which one should we make now?
Like you just rotate through. ’em just put ’em right there and you don’t even have to go in a certain order. You just have it there so that you choose and the place is on the list on the fridge. Like that’s it. Number four is to personalize. If you listen to me, listen to me. If you are not naturally a planner, you don’t have to be a planner.
You don’t have to be now, if you are not naturally a planner, but you are being very binary about it. And you’re like, well, I can’t, I can’t even write my name. Like, come on. Like there are, you don’t have to. That’s when we swing so far lazy that we’re like, well, I just can’t do that. But then, but you really want to a little, but you’re afraid.
You’re afraid that you’re gonna have some sort of identity is like being a planner person. Now, when you don’t wanna be, or the other way, maybe you. Such a planner and you feel hemmed in because of the choices that you made for your dinner a month ago, change your mind, change your mind. Like, just because you are like, this is my personality.
I am this, that doesn’t mean that you can’t settle into something more relaxed around that thing, or you’re not capable of doing something that is a little bit different than that. And still feel like yourself. Yes, we put pressure on ourselves, but I think we don’t tell ourselves the truth.
It’s like, we just think we’re completely incompetent in everything and you might be less competent in certain things than in other things, but that doesn’t mean you are like a walking incompetent person. You’re just not. And I think, you know, that I think, you know, that like deep down, but you’re not kind to yourself, which is another lazy genius principle.
So I just want everybody to be kind to themselves about this. And then the last step to systemize is to make this easy. You can decide once where it’s like, these are the things we eat. We eat this on Monday. We eat this on Tuesday. We eat this on Thursday or we eat. We decide once that like every week different people in the family get to decide what meals we eat from the list done on Sunday nights.
So, and so decides that’s it. That’s the decision. That’s the meal plan or that you have, you decide once when you’re gonna choose, I’m gonna decide what’s for dinner every day by two o clock. That’s my that’s sort of like my own, my own little rule here. I’m gonna decide by two o’clock every day meal plan done, like great.
You’re doing great. So it doesn’t have to look a certain way for it to count and you’re not incompetent. You’re not incompetent. I just want you to be kind to yourself as you learn one small step at a time while still being yourself.
Monica: I think that just sums up why people are drawn to the work you do so much. It’s that foundation. Self-compassion of, of, of, of practicing true kindness with yourself and, and that can happen here in the heart of the home. And it actually, I think it needs to happen, especially after the last couple years. I, I think it’s these, these daily grind kind of things that have worn us down so much.
So thank you for that overall message of kindness and, and. We want to end with one practical way you think people can get started? I would say, beyond buying the book, which I would tell you to do is there even just one small thing you think they can do?
Kendra: So I would say because everybody’s kitchen is so different. If you can just look around like experience your kitchen for the next 24 hours and answer the question, what is keeping me from enjoying this? What is keeping me from enjoying this and if whatever answer comes to mind, if it’s like, I don’t have enough space for anything, make it smaller.
Okay. Why, where do I not have enough space specifically? Like try to make, I want everybody to find a problem and make it as small as possible, and then start small with a very small solution, because as you practice that as, because there’s not one kitchen hack that works for every. Not everybody has a counter space for a drink, spinner, not everybody has a counter space for a zone. Not there are different things that I talk about in the book that I personally love, but they’re not always gonna work for every single person. Right. So I want you to find a small problem and I want you to solve it with a small solution. I had somebody recently, this is just the example of the smallness of it.
I had somebody recently at an event. She was like, I’m just so tired. The cabinet. That we store all the water bottles in is a corner cabinet. And they all are like knocking on top of each other. And and it drives me crazy cuz I can’t get to what I need. And she was like experiencing deep anger every day when she had to get a water bottle.
And so we, I was like, so they’re knocking over. Could you get like a container where you set ’em on their sides? You like line ’em up like that. And she. Yeah. She sent me a DM the next day with a picture of her water bottles and a container on their sides not falling over. And she was like, I didn’t get mad this morning when I had to get everybody’s water bottles.
It’s like these tiny almo, like, I know it’s a weird thing. Like, it makes me emotional thinking about it. Like you guys, you can enjoy your kitchen by getting a container for your water bottles, like making it so that they are on their bellies instead of on their butts. Like truly there is. So I feel this Desire that everybody there, like there’s such potential for enjoyment in your kitchen and you’re not seeing it because you think the problem is too big.
So find a small problem, solve it with a small solution just for today and then maybe C what happens next?
Monica: And I love how that can give you not only the skill set, but the competence to then do that on the next problem. And the
next problem.
Kendra: It’s a muscle. You.
Monica: For sure, Kendra, this has been incredible and which I fully expected. So I, I want to the expectations were high. So listen, we wanna send people to the lazy genius podcast.
Of course, please get the book, the lazy gen genius kitchen. I will link to that all in the show notes. I’m actually gonna link to a couple of your meal planning ones too specifically, so that they’d know where to go from there. So we’ll have that for you. Is there any other place you would recommend?
They.
Kendra: You know, I would say just because it’s fun, the lazy Jeanie’s kitchen show is a, an absolute blast. Like we basically made a TV show to market the book when it came out. Because again, this is one of. It’s a book that’s sort of hard to talk about, like you said this before we got on Mike, you were like, it was the book.
I didn’t know. I needed. And I wanted to write a book that people did not know they needed, but it’s also hard to sell people, a book that they don’t know they need because they’re like, I don’t need that. so so I wanted to demonstrate like in real time how these principles can apply in really small ways.
And so we did six videos with. People that prob at least three or four of the people of the six people whose kitchens we went into your audience would probably be familiar with. It, they are just so fun. They’re they’re like 20 minute. It’s like a show. They are so fun. They’re so good. The team that worked on them just like knocked it outta the park.
So I think that that could be a really, really fun place to go.
Monica: I agree my four year old and I watch those together,
Kendra: Oh, I love
Monica: he loves it too. I just think they’re so great. Well, thank you. Thank you again for being here and helping us tackle these now five biggest challenges. We really appreciate you.
Kendra: I’m so happy to thanks for having me.
Monica: And , this might be inappropriate. I might even cut this out, but I was just, this came to mind. I was thinking like the kitchen is the heart of the home. Also can be the hell of the heart when you are in charge of it.
Kendra: Well, no, the, I actually say, cuz I think I have a line in there that it’s like, the kitchen is supposed to be the heart of the home, but you always feel like you’re like out of breath or like about to have a heart attack. Like it’s not it’s the heart of the home, but your heart could be unhealthy. Your heart could be in danger.
Like you, you, you still wanna have like there it’s you still wanna have a healthy heart. You still wanna take care of it and tend to it and know what makes it. Be under stress versus under energy. That’s like stimulating and good, like good exercise for your heart versus stress for your heart. Like, I mean
Monica: by the way, for you and people listening.
I now have both construction and yard work suddenly happening out of my window.
Kendra: I don’t hear any of it.
Monica: okay. We’ll see how it goes. It’s okay.
