Utilize exploration, find enjoyment, and foster togetherness as you nourish your body as a whole.
Today’s episode is from an exclusive masterclass that was presented to the Strive Hive by registered dietitian Taylor Chan. This won’t happen often, or maybe ever again, but her message on navigating diet culture is too important. When you tune in you’ll hear her teachings on the 3 important new ways to look at nutrition and some reframing around specific food examples. There is also a question and answer session that took place in real time, and you will likely identify with the voices you hear. Taylor doesn’t shy away from answering the big questions, too, like how to deal with family and emotional eating. This holistic approach to looking at food and nutrition is another important factor as we continue to learn how to honor our body this month.
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TRANSCRIPT
Taylor: [00:00:00] Thank you, Monica. Hi everyone. So today we’re going to be talking about redefining nutrition. So we’re going to be taking a look at what we typically think when we hear nutrition and see if we can expand that definition a little bit, to be a little bit more inclusive and a well-rounded version.
So what I did was I did a quick little Google search, and if you Google nutrition, you see a lot of fruits and vegetables. You see some stethoscopes. So which implies maybe like more medical setting. You see someone in a lab coat on there’s hearts, there’s DNA, which apply like some science and a lot of whole foods.
And for me, at least when I see all of this, it’s really the stereotypical ideation of nutrition. So what’d you typically think of when you think of nutrition and these are all suggesting that the purpose of nutrition is to support physical health.
So I pulled this straight from Merriam-Webster nutrition is the study of nutrients and how they interact with your body, the act or process of nourishing or being nourished. And, you know, if you think about it, yeah, the body is so cool. You can eat any food and your body knows exactly what to do with it and knows how to process it, where to distribute those nutrients, to where they need to go all without us having to give it a second thought.
And by doing this, we’re able to provide our body with energy. We’re help. We’re helping prevent ourselves from getting sick and in the chances that we do get sick, proper nutrition can help with recovery as well. So yes, nutrition supports physical health, which is great, but nutrition also impacts so much more than physical health and support so many areas beyond physical health too.
And so I thought we could talk about that a little bit. Through food we can explore. There’s so much that you can learn through food. I think one of food’s greatest superpowers is bringing people to gather it’s a key part of togetherness. Food is culture. It’s connection to our heritage, especially around holidays and celebration because we have those really strong food traditions that tie us to our culture.
And last but not least food is fun. It tastes good. It makes us feel good. Enjoying food is so important. So for the next few minutes, I’m going to take some time to go through each of these in more detail, talking about what they are important or not relationship to food and how we can begin to incorporate some of these into our everyday food decisions, everyday mindset around food.
So we’ll begin with exploration. Exploration through food means trying different flavors, different cuisines, which can help us learn about other cultures. We can try new recipes, pick up different ingredients, which can teach us new skills and techniques in the kitchen. How does explore and have fun in the kitchen?
Whenever we’re traveling somewhere, it’s always customary to try the local fair. So if you’re going to new England, you’re going to hide the clam chowder. If you’re going to Philadelphia, you’ll probably find a cheese steak. And there’s probably so many other different examples you can think of when you’re traveling.
You’re always gonna want to try something to immerse yourself in the local culture. Same thing when you’re going to a restaurant, when you go to a restaurant, you’re going to want to try that house special. And there’s some required exploration too, especially for kids. So kids need to try new foods in order to expand their pallets in order to learn and grow.
It’s part of their learning process. And then for adults, I mean that required explanation can apply to it’s lifelong learning for us and helps us keep an open mind to try new things as adults as well. And, you know, it can just be fun, fun to try new things and switch it up a little bit. So some things to think about whenever we’re trying to incorporate more exploration or be more aware of the exploration that we aren’t including in our everyday.
When’s the last time that you’ve tried something new. I had someone poses a question to me not too long ago. And it was really eye-opening, you know, I go to the grocery store, I pick up generally the same things every single time, and I really get stuck into that routine. So you have to be really intentional about trying something new.
What’s a new food that you’ve tried recently. What’s a favorite food that you’ve had maybe while traveling or checking out a new restaurant. And then can you try to incorporate at least one new thing a week? So the takeaway that I hope you get from here is how can you try to make trying new things, a regular practice.
And it can be something as small as going to the store and picking up a new brand of bread or picking up a different type of apple. Maybe you normally get gala. And this time you want to try that delicious. It could look like ordering something different off the menu from your favorite restaurant. It doesn’t have to be completely new entree, maybe just a different protein or a different sauce or something like that.
Or in your Chipolte label, you add tomatoes this time. It’s sometimes it’s just so easy to get stuck in a routine, picking up the same things every single time. And so here, I want you to try to focus on incorporating new things into our current routine and really push yourself out of your comfort zone in that sense.
Moving on to togetherness. So food is at the center of every social gathering, whether you’re grabbing a coffee with a friend you’re going out to a potluck party, or bringing your favorite dish to share, going to birthday parties, going out to dinner, wherever there’s food there’s people. And the contrast of that is also true.
Wherever there’s people. There’s probably going to be food too. And, you know, togetherness may probably has looked a little bit different this past year with zoom calls and some food drop off and sending goodies through the mail. But I think a testament to how food brings people together is we’ve really been able to preserve some of those food traditions, some of that togetherness, even as we’ve been navigating quarantine.
And it really just speaks to how food is a really important way that we communicate love and care for one another. And of course eating is the one thing that we all have in common. We all have to eat. And so the best way to eat is together
It’s a time to connect and converse with others to hear about others’ perspectives. It’s a time when kids can practice those conversational skills, they can practice listening and empathizing, which are really important skills as they grow into adults.
It also helps you to be more open to trying new foods. So bringing in that exploration a little bit too, whenever you’re around the table with your friends and you see that your friends are eating a food that maybe you’ve never tried before, if your friends like it, then you actually might like it too.
And it just makes it seem a little bit more approachable and have you be a little bit more open to trying something new. And it also helps slow down the eating process. So if you’re eating with other people, the chances are, you’re probably going to be talking between bites and this gives your body a little bit more time to digest and break down and absorb those nutrients.
It also helps you be a little bit more present in the moment and focus on that eating experience. So when we’re thinking about togetherness, we can think about things like what’s your favorite go-to potluck party dish. What’s that one dish that you love to share with other people? What does your table look like?
Especially around the holidays? What brings your family together? What’s a favorite family dish. This could be at the holidays or outside of the holidays. Where do you really love to go to eat with your friends? And of course, how are you able to adapt and maintain food traditions during COVID. And I think that these questions are just really helpful to bring a sense of togetherness and just reflecting on those things that, yeah, whenever our family gets together, there’s always food there.
I know for my family, my mom’s side of the family is from Indonesia. And so when my grandmother came over, she brought this recipe, this pork satay, which is essentially marinated skewer pork. And so what my uncle does now is he marinates all the pork. And then when it’s about time, I’m ready to eat. We’ll all get together.
We’re skewer the pork out, fill it out together. And it’s a really fun time for the family to be together and make a family recipe that we would all enjoy later on. So that togetherness is really, really important. And we can’t talk about togetherness without talking about culture. So food and culture are very tightly intertwined.
You can’t have culture without food. And of course there’s a lot of overlap here with togetherness too. So your personal food culture can be heritage based. Meaning this family foods that you grow up with is things that you ate growing up or it could be location-based. So if, for example, I’m from Maryland and one of the big parts of the food culture of Maryland is eating crabs.
And so that would also be a part of my food culture, because it’s where I’m from with that locality of it. So whenever immigrants travel to a new country, move to a new country, they’ll bring recipes from their home countries to bring a piece of home with them. And this becomes a comfort food, a sense of pride, and they’ll pass it down from generation to generation to preserve that culture and also educate the next generation about their culture.
And when we talk in a culture, it’s also a really important part whenever we’re having nutrition discussions. Yet it’s so often left out cultural foods are so important. They’re really meaningful and personal. Yet cultural future often demonized in nutrition discussions, which meat leaves a lot of people feeling unheard.
So for example, white rice is in a very important part of Asian and Latin cuisines. So if you see all this nutrition recommendation saying, oh, like eat brown rice or eat cauliflower rice, instead of white rice, you’re asking a lot of people to remove a large part of their cultural foods and their part separating them from their cultural identity.
And so whenever we are having nutrition conversations with people and doing nutrition goal setting, we want to make sure that those cultural foods are being honored rather than removed. So some benefits of eating for culture, you are building community and family, and you’re strengthening that bond through food.
We’re able to celebrate holidays and religious events. And whenever you have circled certain cultural foods, there’s likely some specific ingredients or preparation methods that you use to make that. So being able to connect to those and honor those can really help create value and respect around food.
So by eating for culture, it really just gives a whole new meaning to food. So some things to think about here, what types of food traditions do you have? How does food play a role in your connection to culture? What foods are meaningful and nostalgic to you? What transports you back to childhood? And what are your comfort foods?
What are the things that you go to when you’re feeling a little bit homesick or just a little upset and need a good pick me up? These are all cultural considerations
Last but not least here we have enjoyment. So food tastes good should make you feel good, and you should be able to enjoy your food by eating for enjoyment, you can strengthen and develop a better relationship with food. It also gives you a little bit more flexibility to engage in social events and try new foods.
So if a friend asked you spontaneously to go and grab a bite to eat, you can have that spontaneity without having to worry about looking ahead to see what’s available on the menu. If you’re walking down the street and you pass over really cute cupcake shop, you can stop in and just grab a couple flavors to try just for the fun of it.
Eating for enjoyment also provides greater satisfaction with meals. So, this is not only feeling physically full and physically satisfied, but rather mentally and emotionally satisfied. So let’s say I have an apple when what I really want is a cookie. I’m not going to feel satisfied, right? Because an apple is in no way comparable to a cookie.
And so if I want a cookie, I should be able to eat that cookie if it’s available to me. So then that way I can have emotional satisfaction. Eating for enjoyment also helps with digestion. When you eat food that you’re enjoying your body triggers a rest and digest response, which helps your body to absorb nutrients and break that food down.
And the opposite is true here too. So if you’re stressed about the food that you’re eating, if you’re having a stressful eating experience or in a really stressful environment while you’re eating, this could actually inhibit digestion and lead to GI distress, constipation, test, stomach, those kinds of things that aren’t so fun, which is kind of a great segue into what I want to talk about next, but just stress around food, particularly guilt around enjoying food.
So I don’t know if you’ve ever noticed before, but I hear this come up a lot. There is a lot, a lot, a lot of guilt and shame around feeling pleasure and enjoyment from food. So you’ve probably heard someone say something along the lines of, oh, I feel so bad for eating these, but they just taste so good.
And so here you’re having those conflicting feelings are really enjoying what they’re eating, but they feel really bad about it. And they have that cognitive dissonance. Or something like, oh, that cake was so yummy, but you know, I’m definitely going to have to run this off leader. So this doesn’t explicitly say good or bad, but it still indicates that guilt and that need for compensation as a result of enjoying their food. And food marketing uses that sort of like double angel on your shoulder mindset as a selling tactic too.
And it capitalizes on this to make you feel like you should feel a little bit taboo or rebellious for enjoying foods, which creates this alert around food. So you’ve probably seen words on I’m thinking of desserts in particular, because I feel like that’s where these words are used. The most things like sinful indulgent, guilty pleasure.
I mean, it’s right there. You should feel guilty about experiencing pleasure and guilt free. So this is a really interesting one, but I want you to think about it like this. If you were to buy a loaf of bread and on that packaging, it says made without poison. That’s going to create some doubt, right? And you’re going to say, wait, was my bread supposed to have poison in it should I, should that be something I’m concerned about?
And the same thing happens with guilt free. When you see them on a package and you go, wait, am I supposed to be feeling guilty about this? Should I be feeling guilty for eating this? The food isn’t good or bad? The food that we eat doesn’t impact who we are. And it shouldn’t you feel about ourselves. Food is morally neutral.
And as we’ve discussed so far, we eat so many different foods for so many different reasons. And enjoying foods is just part of being human. We should be able to enjoy our food period.
So some food for thought for you all here. What foods do you enjoy truly genuinely enjoy? What about those foods make it so enjoyable to you. When you are enjoying foods, do you notice feelings of guilt or shame? Do these appear more so with some foods rather than others and why might this be? Do you feel like you’re a better or worse person for eating some foods over others?
And why might that be? And how is satisfying emotionally, mentally satisfying? Is this food feeling for you in this moment?
So to start to wrap things up a little bit, I thought it would be helpful to talk about how we can incorporate all the things that we’ve talked about so far and to building a more positive relationship with food. So one of the things that you can do is by starting to focus on the experience around food, rather than just the food itself is that are in that food.
So the five W’s who, what, when, where life, who were you eating with? What are you having? When are you eating it? Is it a special occasion or is it just like your everyday lunch? Where are you? Where are you having it? What is that eating experience? That dining experience and environment like? And why are you eating it again?
Is it just a special occasion? Is it something that your friend brought over for you to try? Is it something that you just wanted to whip right up and try a new recipe for? And then you also want to think about using your senses and really immerse yourself into that experience. So what does it taste like?
Is it sweet, salty? What does it smell like? What’s that texture? Is it hot, cold, crunchy, soft all of those different senses. I’m blanking on the last two right now. It’s okay. And so you want to be able to, it was only experienced around three and a part of that is setting aside dedicated time to eat.
So, if you can set up a calm, relaxing environment, if they’re with other people, try to limit the conversation to things that are less tense and less controversial, and also try to limit distractions to give yourself the opportunity to truly focus on what you’re eating. So if you can put down the phone, turn off the TV really just be there in the moment.
And then of course, reflecting on how food supports overall health, not only physically, but is it supporting you socially, emotionally, culturally, financially is what you’re eating, saving your time and energy to focus on other things in your life. I think those are really important considerations and noticing how you think and talk about food.
So do you tend to gravitate towards labeling foods as good or as bad? And if you do, what kind of reframes can you offer to move away from this type of thinking? So when we’re in the process of building a more positive relationship with food, let’s strengthening our relationship with food. It’s not easy and it’s not going to happen overnight, especially when we have so much messaging that is, and it’s something that’s going to happen slowly, intentionally over time.
There’s a lot of unlearning, but also a lot of relearning. And so it’s really important to be kind and gentle to yourself in the process. So I mentioned some reframes, so I put together some examples of reframe things. So then that way you can to begin to challenge some of that internal dialogue around food and practice some for yourself as well.
And as I go through these again, I want you to take note of some of the ways that exploration culture, togetherness and enjoyment can be part of these refunds and really drive them. So I picked two foods that tend to be pretty well demonized in the nutrition world, the first being pizza. Pizza is a childhood favorite.
I grew up loving it, eating it with all of my friends. It’s a crowd pleaser, something that almost everyone likes, a crowd pleaser because there’s so many toppings that you can have on it, easily customizable. So then that way everyone will be happy. And of course, any pizza parties, I feel like that’s a given, right?
Some fun around pizza pizza. Isn’t easy, hot dinner option for takeout. If that’s something that you don’t feel like cooking for the day whenever you’re traveling to New York or Chicago, they take a whole lot of pride in their pizza. So when you go there, you have to try their version of pizza. It’s really fun to make it home, you know, get the dough, put on the sauce and the cheese and all of your favorite, top things, and really rewarding to make at home.
And in general pizza, just some warm, cheesy goodness. That’s and then we have cake. So I don’t know about you all. Well, whenever I think of cake, I think of really fun and exciting times like birthday parties, weddings, celebrations. There’s always cake there, but they can come a little cupcake forms too.
Really cute. And there’s so many different flavor combinations. You can have different flavored, batters, different icings, different fillings, all the different decorations. It’s really fun to get people together and decorate a cake. Especially if it’s me. If you’re making it for someone really special to celebrate someone special it’s cake is a way where you can support a local bakery, go to your local bakery and pick up a cake, pick up a dessert.
And it’s a way of giving back to the community. Whenever you’re making a cake, you know that it’s always baked and served with love. And if you’re just in the mood for something sweet, a slice of cake can go a long way in satisfying that sweet craving. Sweet little pick me up.
So if you remember back at the beginning, we talked about that original definition of nutrition, the study of nutrients, the after process of nourishing or being nourished, referring to food in a very physical sense, how food affects our physical health. But again, it is so much more than just nutrients, and it affects so much more than just our physical health.
It nourishes us socially, culturally, emotionally, mentally, and supports those aspects of our wellbeing. And that’s equally, if not more important. We eat so many different foods for so many different reasons. So moving forward, I hope that when you think about nutrition, you’re able to expand that definition.
So then that way your new definition of nutrition is one that encompasses exploration, togetherness, culture, and enjoyment.
Monica: [00:22:45] That was amazing. I almost felt like that was a good kind of fire hose where you’re just like, well, wait, I need to talk about this so much more and dig into it. And in fact, that’s a lot of what the chat has been about so far, just how much deeper this is in terms of our own reframing and needing to change the dialogue both internally and externally in our environments where we can, where we can control them.
Cause sometimes, I mean, a lot of places, actually, we can’t step in, in the middle of every family conversation on diet culture and keep pointing it out. You know, So we had a few questions that came up
Strive Hive Member: [00:23:18] I think it’s important to think, like to think about, oh, Am I just feeling guilt because this is something that I viewed as not healthy versus like, I really am overeating like truly and feeling guilt about that.
And also like, why am I over eating? Like emotionally, like I’m overwhelmed and then use some like emotional things I need to analyze. And, you know, some of that could be deeper with a counselor. So yeah. And if you can help me flush it out there, Monica,
Monica: [00:23:48] I think that that was a good way to say it. Let’s see where Taylor takes us and I’m sure we’ll have a few follow-up questions to help with this.
I can add too and others as well.
Taylor: [00:23:57] Okay. So I, the first thing that comes to mind when I heard your question is, is yes, that’s a very normal feeling, especially when you are starting to have, when you are starting to navigate your relationship with food. There’s a lot of questions. And the fact that you have questions just means that your care and that you are trying.
So I don’t really have any easy answers for how to resolve that, but that really just is part of the process. And that means that you are doing something right. But you know, just keep with it. And those are just going to be continual conversations and there might not always be a definitive right.
Or wrong answer. And sometimes it, you just gotta, you can just move past it and, you know, just accept it for what it is and be like, yeah, maybe I overate, but that’s okay. And just move on to the next meal.
Monica: [00:24:47] And one thing I like about what you just said, why like everything, but one thing in particular was this is not a one size fits all fits all.
You know, it’s something that you have to figure out in the moment. It sounds like what you’re saying, Taylor, and based on my own experience too, especially like she said , this is a new paradigm shift that you’re trying to lean into and navigate how to lean into this nuance of your relationship with food.
And instead of being in the all or nothing framework, both nutritionally and in terms of quantity, then you’re going to have been an experimental time. It sounds like, and it’s going to be really personal where you draw the line of I’m exploring the food. I’m getting used to it. I’m allowing things to be on the table, especially with intuitive eating.
That’s a whole part of the process. And I’m sure Taylor could say more to that too. We’ll hand the mic back over to her, but also it seems like there’s just that balance of knowing, okay, this does seem to me being a way to numb myself or to get away from the fear or the pain or the trauma I’m going through.
Then that’s probably different. Anything else? Taylor?
Taylor: [00:25:51] I think you covered most of it. Like that was a great summary. But I would say that, yeah, it’s just, you’re so used to having everything black and white, like eat this, not that. And when you’re trying to amend and strengthen your relationship with food, you’re really in that messy gray space in the middle where there isn’t a clear cut answer.
And so it was just trying to navigate through that gray space and, you know, understanding that every day is completely different. How you feel every day is going to be different. The food that you have available to you every day is going to be different. And so that’s just the art of life. And that’s part of embracing that process to a better relationship with food.
Monica: [00:26:32] I feel like it’s, you’re playing the long game too. Like this is not going to be a relationship that can be healed in a short amount of time. And it’s going to involve a lot of messiness and ups and downs and. Some healing and also some help where it might be needed. I think.
And I’m, again, I’m just speaking from someone who has been through this. I don’t know if Taylor even knows this. I have the history with eating disorders and moving into intuitive eating, which is a big part of why this is a value in our community. So okay. Another question that was asked on what to do with the child who does seem to be doing secretive eating where it seems like a little bit of a, of an alarm for the mom.
Like, is that a problem? And if so, I’m sure it’s dependent on the situation, but what advice do you have?
Taylor: [00:27:15] If you’re in a place with a relationship with your child that you feel like you can approach them about it then that might be something good to do. Just figuring out why they might be doing that.
And if there’s something that could be happening in their food environment that is creating that behavior. But if it is something that you are particularly concerned about, I would recommend reaching out to a professional about it to delve into that a little bit more and help you navigate that situation.
Monica: [00:27:40] And I love your advice on that because really, it probably have to be a lot more of a deep dive on what else is going on, what other signs and signals, because yeah, there is this balance, right? Taylor of enjoying food and leading into the cultural aspect that togetherness, and also recognizing and being intuitive about it.
But also recognizing when it’s a mask or like an armor we’re putting out between our feelings. Any other guidance about emotional eating in general? I think that is something that has come up in the comments a bit throughout.
Taylor: [00:28:10] I would say embrace emotional, eating, all eating is inherently emotional. You know, we eat during happy occasions. We eat, drink sad occasions we eat when we’re feeling upset. And so I think that. I embracing emotional eating. You’re just embracing part of being human and being someone who can go to food. I will say that if so are the traditional sense of what we think of emotional eating that it is okay to use food as a coping mechanism, because as we talked about, we do have comfort foods, those foods that make us feel all warm and fuzzy and safe inside.
But it’s also important to explore other coping mechanisms as well, too. So I would just say, just explore some other things that may also bring you that sense of peace and comfort. In addition to food.
Monica: [00:29:01] That’s an amazing distinction there. So it’s not that emotional eating is not allowed it’s that there needs to be more tools.
But you’re also leading into and using to help. And I think this is just kind of what we were talking about too. The more you just see, like, this is a signal like, okay, this means I’m anxious. If I typically find myself in the pantry a lot during the day, it’s not because it’s bad.
It’s not because I need to not do it. It’s just a signal that I am struggling with another emotional thing that I need to just pay attention to and deal with a little bit more.
Taylor: [00:29:37] So I’m just curious how you can express this or how to invite family members who are entrenched in diet culture or who may be resistant. How can you involve them or what’s the word? How can you expose them express to them, your desire to change without feeling like they’re being pressured into something?
Does that make sense? Yeah, so that’s a really tough one. I feel like I get that question all the time because diet culture is so pervasive and having those family meals and that together, this can be really difficult if you’re on a completely different page than the rest of your family members. And so I’ve dealt with this personally And, you know, sometimes people just aren’t in the right head space to be able to hear some of this newer more inclusive messaging.
And so people aren’t in this space to be receptive to some of this messaging that I would say you would have to set a hard boundary with them, like say like, oh, like I’m really not comfortable with the way you’re talking about food. I’m really trying to work on my own relationship with food. Can we just not talk about this?
And I think that’s a really important thing to be able to do, especially because it can just be so toxic to have those messages constantly coming into you from people that you really love and care about. But some ways that you can kind of work around that or do instead is you can just plant little seeds here and there with the way that you’re talking about food.
So if someone’s like, oh, like what I’m eating is so unhealthy. You could just be like, oh, like, it depends on what you define health. As for me, I define health as more than just physical. I like to incorporate my social, mental, emotional, cultural health as well. And just by being able to offer some of those reframes, if someone says, oh, this food is so bad for me, they say, well, oh, like we’re all eating it together.
And this is a chance for us to be together with this food. I think could be really helpful too. So being able to plant those little seeds where you can, but also being able to draw that from you need to, in order to protect yourself and your energy.
Monica: [00:31:53] Okay. Thank you for, for sharing that. This is, this is so fascinating. We’re getting so many big a-ha’s. I know I am.
One thing that has come up in our community a lot is just learning to lean into intuitive eating. And for many in our strive hive, it’s the first time that they are doing this. So I was wondering from your standpoint, just what are some obstacles they can expect to face and how to work through those and ways that they’re able to continue on this path instead of thinking that’s not right for them?
Taylor: [00:32:30] Well, that’s a big question. So I guess on your intuitive eating journey, I mean the most obvious obstacles are just all of that. Counter-cultural messaging conflicting with what you all already believe in. So a lot of that unlearning and relearning, it’s going to be a lot of internal dialogue to kind of like work through some of those nuances and how this conversation with yourself and thinking, where does my relationship with food stand?
Why was I having that thought about this food in this certain way? Am I overeating right now? Or is this something that I’m just giving myself permission to eat? And it feels like I’m overeating because I’m finally giving myself permission to eat it. So I think that those internal dialogues are going to be the toughest part and a lot of overthinking, possibly a lot of over-analyzing.
I know I do that all the time, but for me personally, the easy part was identifying my food goals. So what food rules do I currently hold? And I meet even now, I’m still finding food rules that I hold, and I never thought of them as food rules. And then with being in nutrition classes and things like that, we’re taught all of these diet rules, rules, all these food rules in the name of health.
And so kind of unlearning some of that from what I’ve learned in my classes has been a big piece of that as well as just like for all of you on learning, all of the messaging that you’ve been hearing is going to be really difficult. And then the other piece of that, which I saw in the chat here is challenging some of that fat phobia, that fear of weight gain the fear of fatness.
And that’s a really, really tough one, especially when there is so much fatphobia in everyday culture, in our medical industry. It’s very real and it needs to, it’s something that we have to challenge our own biases and internalized fat phobia against too.
Strive Hive Member: [00:34:37] Just to give Taylor a little background, I quit weight Watchers, which I’d been a lifelong member, you know, not that I was ever at goal weight for very long, but I’ve always gone.
And so I’ve just really been working through that and trying to just be accepting, but it’s really hard. Cause I have a lot of fatphobia even though, you know, to me, I’m a fat person, it’s a, it’s just ingrained in me. And so I’m always feel like I’m fighting against that. And one of the biggest things I’ve had to do, like I used to weigh myself every day.
And so I just let myself weigh myself once a week now. And I try to tell myself it doesn’t matter. That number doesn’t determine my worth, but it’s really hard.
Taylor: [00:35:25] Yeah. I hear you. But also, I mean, the fact that you were able to walk away from what was such a source of culture and into this space of the unknown, I mean, that’s huge and that’s super brave.
Strive Hive Member: [00:35:42] So one thing I noticed is like how relaxed you are talking about food. And when I talk about food, like, it makes me almost like nervous. Like I just, I don’t like talking about it.
But one thing I, so how do you, like, what would be a good first step? I know you’ve kind of talked about like changing your mindset, but how do you kind of get rid of like that fear of food? Like fear has the negative thing. Like, do you have a mantra that you say, or is there something that can just like.
Be put into practice. Like what’s kind of the first step for that because it’s, I just, I don’t have good feelings about it. I guess I’m in that messy part right now where I don’t, I don’t like how I feel about food. So what would be like a good thing to start with?
Taylor: [00:36:26] I love that question. I think one of the first things that you can start with is just identifying what your food fears are and what about those foods are making you feel that anxiety and that stress just creating awareness around the feelings that you’re having around food and why you’re having them and just taking notice of whether or not some foods create that more than others and why that might be.
And then once you kind of have like a list of all those different things that you’re experiencing with certain foods, if you feel comfortable and able to do it, pick whichever one seems the least scariest and try going with that and just try and maybe like a little bite and see what happens. And I think you, as you gradually try to tackle that list and work through one by one, it doesn’t have to be all in a week.
It can be over the course of a year or two or three. But the more that you start to tackle those food fears head on, I think you just become a little bit more confident and emboldened to be able to continue to try to break through some of those things.
Strive Hive Member: [00:37:33] Yeah. I mean, I can tell you, like, I think my biggest fear is food equals gaining weight for me big time.
And I rarely ever see food as like an enjoyment or something to bring me closer together with family. Like it’s just something that I have to do or I do to cope or, you know, things like that. But I think a huge one is the gaining weight. Like that’s a big one for me.
Taylor: [00:37:58] Yeah. And that’s a really hard one too.
I mean, I think a lot of people hold that fear. And then, yeah, you just got to start small. And if tackling that fear right now seems like too much start with something a little bit smaller. So if you’re afraid of sugar, then maybe just try incorporating a little bit more sugar rather than Stevia or something where you can and then see where that takes you.
I mean, you don’t have to tackle food equals weight gain. That’s a huge one. And we’ll just tackle that one immediately. So just slowly work your way up to it.
Monica: [00:38:29] And it goes back to what you were talking to Taylor about, you know, that phobia in general, just kind of leaning into that. And I would say to that It doesn’t have to be, I’m trying to say this without being, you know, kind of leaning into more of the diet culture, but I also think intuitive eating and honoring your body and having enjoyment and having it be about sociability and togetherness.
I don’t think that automatically spells weight gain either. And it’s kind of what, what Taylor was talking about. Like when you lean into enjoyment and togetherness and mindfulness, you’re able to actually pay attention better to your body’s signals.
Taylor: [00:39:08] Yeah. And I think that by having those reframes and being more intentional about creating the frames, the attention away from all this food has so many, whatever it is, and this food is so bad. I mean, this food is going to cause me to gain weight to more. Tell me, focus more on the experience around food. And does that provide more context to that food rather than just what the food is?
Monica: [00:39:37] Jenna says, I noticed that I feel bad when I eat beyond what I need to feel satisfied, but when I eat, because I’m enjoying the experience, whether it be social or because I’m enjoying the experience of trying something new, I rarely feel guilty about it.
And usually to me too, that usually like you were talking about helping me know the body signals better. Like I know when I’m like this cake is dry and I don’t like it. Or, wow, this is so delicious. I’m enjoying every bite. Like you’re able to differentiate instead of just saying, cake is bad. Cake is bad. Cake is bad. You’re able to say, Hmm, I don’t like this cake. I want to put it aside. Cause I’d rather eat something else. Or this is so delicious. I’m enjoying the experience.
Taylor: [00:40:17] Yeah. And I think that really goes back to that satisfaction factor too. Right. So if I really want a cookie, but I have an apple, I’m not going to feel satisfied.
So maybe I’ll be like, oh, I’ll have some sort of low calorie snack pack instead of having a cookie and then maybe, oh, like maybe you’ll have some juice instead of having a cookie. And by the time, you know it, by the time you actually have that cookie, you’ve already had like 10 to 12 other foods trying to satisfy that craving.
What all you really wanted was I cookies. I don’t need to just eat that cookie and satisfy that craving upfront where you can.
Monica: [00:40:49] And that’s part of the learning. Too. Cause even that first, like the first probably, I don’t know how many, it might be a month for some people. It might be years. If you’re like me, you eat that cookie.
You’re like, I’m allowed to eat that cookie. And the whole time you’re thinking panic, no bad. And then you eat another one, you kind of go into spiral, but I promise you over time, it will stick.
And you’ll be able to know that was satisfying and I’m so happy and I’m ready to move on to something else.
Taylor: [00:41:15] Yes.
It takes a lot of practice, but it’ll come.
Monica: [00:41:19] So this is a great question. She says, I seem to have made new rules where I can’t eat healthy things because it feels like I’m being restrictive.
Is that normal? How do I start eating more nutritious foods? Now , let me, let me clarify. Does this mean you’re like. When I talked to Lexi about beauty redefined, where I’m like, if I’m body positive, does that mean like, I can still like wearing makeup and clothes? Like, should I not like those things? Is that what you’re asking or is it a different thing you can clarify?
Strive Hive Member: [00:41:45] I think it’s kind of like that. Yeah. I just I’ve been on
this, like doing intuitive eating for like three years now. So I, I feel like I’m kind of over the diet culture, like have moved on from there, but because of that, it feels like anytime I eat, you know, fruits, vegetables, like a salad, I’m like, it’s like, I’ve gone too far.
You know? Like I can’t find a good in-between place because it feels like I’m being restrictive if I am eating those things.
Taylor: [00:42:17] Yeah. And I will say I definitely had that experience too. Especially as a dietician, whenever you go out to eat with friends, they’re always like, oh, Of course you would get the salad or whatever, or, oh my gosh, you’re eating a burger.
I thought you were a dietician. And so I feel like whenever I first got into intuitive eating, I was just like, I’m kind of proved that I’m like a cool dietician that I like all these fun foods too. So anytime we would go out to eat, I’d get like a burger, I get a pizza, I’d get whatever what seem quote unquote, bad to other people.
And I think that it’s just, yeah, you are kind of like on a pendulum and if you’re so far over this way, you swing all the way over here, but eventually it’ll come back to the middle and center out a little bit. So I mean, it’s, again, just part of the process and I hate that. I have to keep saying that, but it really is so true.
Monica: [00:43:09] And we’re familiar with that here. The great thing about this community is we know that small wins build over time, but it’s a mess. It’s, it’s a, it’s a roller coaster, but remember what we also learned, but you do change, you do change. It does get easier with time. You do have this new framework and you won’t go back once you’re able to see the freedom that you have in your life of being able to be a real person and to cultivate
fulfillment in your life.
Okay. I have one more question for Taylor. My question is just as a dietitian in the field, like I didn’t attrition classes in college. The food rules were abundant. Just like you talked about with your own training, but how has it been shifting in your work? Is it shifting, do you get pushed back as a dietician for these viewpoints or is it becoming a little bit more universally acknowledged and shared within your career?
Taylor: [00:44:04] I think that we’ve kind of gotten to a point where people are generally willing to say, no diets are not cool. And that telling people to restrict is not cool. But I think that that’s kind of morphed into some other ways, but now instead of saying, oh, like we’re afraid of eating these foods because we don’t want to gain weight.
It’s kind of come this like, well, let’s see messaging and say like, oh, in order to not get sick in order to live a very long life, you need to eat these certain foods for longevity and health. So I think that. That diet culturey messaging is still there. Justin, very different, a little bit sneakier ways.
But I will say more dieticians, especially younger dietitians are more on board with the messaging that we should be more culturally aware and incorporating some of those cultural foods and being able to listen to people from different backgrounds and that, you know, it’s not okay to tell people not to eat and with the positive movement.
There also has been more of a shift to being able to accept or see more representation of people in different sized bodies across the spectrum. But I think that’s something that’s become really important to you is that we are starting to have these conversations more often, even the, if people aren’t totally on board with where some folks are at right now.
Monica: [00:45:30] I just have taken so much away from this conversation. I’m really grateful that you took so much time with, in preparation of this, of this incredible masterclass, but also just your generosity and answering our very specific questions here tonight.
So again, want to remind everyone, you got to go to see Taylor on @foodandfearless. And also maybe we can continue this conversation on the Strive Hive too, and just see how people are navigating this for the next few days as it comes up for you. And it just is part of the process and we’re going to be here for each other.
Taylor: [00:46:03] Yeah. Thank you all so much for being here and chatting with us. Yes, this was wonderful.
